Now I really need your help. So please, any of you from this part of the world feel free to tell me if I'm craZy or I simply just don't get how things go here.
Quite some time ago a guy rammed his car into mine causing about 400 KM worth of damage. Apparently he wasn't insured at the time and begged me (with some rather pitiful whining) not to call the police. I didn't. We agreed to meet up so he would pay me for the damage. He dissed me three times.
Then I saw him at my neighbours place working and I basically told him what I thought of him. What I think of him is sort of irrelevant though. The thing is, most of my neighbours continue to hire him to do handy work around their properties. It ticks me off. One neighbour, and good friend, can't quite grasp why I won't even come over while he is there working.
I told him plain and simple – if someone did that to you, my dear friend, there is no way in hell I would invite him to work (and make money) right under your nose. Firstly, you're my friend and it would be (at least to me) insulting. Secondly, its sending the message that there are no sanctions for bad behaviour.
The carsija mentality here is ‘if he hasn't cheated me….it's none of my business.’ So the cycle of cheating, lying and being assholes continues without end.
My neighbour cannot fathom why this would bother me. The mentality of ‘until someone shoots me in the forehead I'm immune and indifferent to him shooting others’ puzzles me. It doesn't make any sense. Social structures worldwide have always had their means of punishing others for bad deeds. Here, one is rewarded for bad behaviour – or at least never sanctioned.
I could care less about the 400 KM. But isn't there any moral compass working in this country? I have to go to my home and look at the guy who lied and cheated working for my neighbours and I'm the mad one for not wanting to go over to visit them whilst he's there.
Please help me out…Am I nuts or is the carsija mentality the justified unwritten law of the land….?
"don't screw me and I could care less if you screw everybody around me.’
you're absolutely right.
plus – in addition to the ‘screw everyone else but me and i won't care’, there's another golden rule = ‘screw me too, but if i can screw you over even more then we're good’.
I've just discovered you're back… been reading throught your last posts…. keep writing, I believe there are lot of people like me, which are glad to see you back…
It's stunning, but it happens all the time. Myself, I always say it, and name it. When I can do it without emotions, that's a success. One step at a time.